I could actually have probably called this “A Bajillion ADHD Myths that We Need to Stop Believing,” but there is only so much bandwidth on the internet. So instead, let’s stick with these five.
And of course, if you’d like to watch it, you can go here. You can also listen here.
Myth #1: You can’t focus if you have ADHD
I get it: it’s right there in the name: attention deficit. That means that if you’re able to read a physics textbook, or if your kid can sit through a movie, then they don’t have ADHD, right?
I fell for this myself while looking into my son’s diagnosis. He can sit and play video games for hours. I’m pretty sure that I could load him on a barge to Antarctica and he wouldn’t notice he was surrounded by penguins until his tablet ran out of battery. Therefore, I figured, he can’t possibly have a disorder that’s widely characterized by inattention, right?
Except, as most of us know now, hyperfocus is absolutely a thing. ADHD brains can absolutely focus when the situation is of some interest and tweaks the right parts. Unfortunately, this is still something people believe, and it’s most likely getting in the way of diagnoses.
If you’re still not sure, think of it this way: When you say your bank account is at a deficit, that there isn’t money in the account, but it doesn’t mean that money can’t ever be deposited into it. ADHD brains are the same, so let’s squash this myth dead pleaseandthankyou.
Myth #2: You’ve always got energy if you have ADHD
I got a couch divot the exact size and shape of my ass that would like to disagree with this one.
The problem here is that ADHD was, for the longest time, considered the “hyper little boys’ disease,” and human beings don’t exactly like letting go of belief systems, even when they’re antiquated and harmful.
The fact is, hyperactivity can absolutely be a symptom, but so can constant and chronic fatigue. The true cause isn’t 100% agreed upon, but there are those out there who believe that a racing mind plays into that constant tiredness.
In my totally non-medical opinion, I think there’s a lot to it, including nutrition; attention to energy requirements; other mental health issues, and personal energy levels. So if you’re tired all the time, you could absolutely still have ADHD. Which I’m sure is both an exciting concept, and also a not-so-great-one.
Sorry.
Myth 3: If you seem “normal,” you can’t have ADHD
First of all, I’m not even sure what “normal” is supposed to mean, which says something about me, I suppose.
Second of all, my guess when people say this is that they mean that the person in question has no problem socially, which, while impressive, also means jack-doodly-squat.
People with ADHD, who are on the Autism spectrum, and who deal with a number of other mental differences can be very good at something called masking. Usually, after years of observing and dealing with the fallout from doing “weird” things, different brains will pick up on the patterns they need to seem…well…not different. Speech patterns, vocal tones, and facial expressions can all be learned to seem like absolutely nothing different is going on in a brain that’s a literal fireworks show behind the scenes.
Fact is, I know from personal experience that masking is tiring and it takes a lot of energy. There’s a reason why studies seem to indicate a correlation between ADHD and introversion.
Also, keep in mind that there are more ADHD symptoms out there than just interrupting people or oversharing; that “normal” affectation can hide a person who struggles to keep organized, doesn’t sleep well, and/or can’t get things done just like the rest of us.
Book, cover, and all that.
Myth 4: If you can’t focus you MUST have ADHD
Ok, so this is a little different from the other myths, but it’s one that deserves mention. There are a number of people who’ll message me to say “Arianna, I think I have ADHD.”
“OK,” I’ll say, “what makes you think that?”
“Well…I have a hard time focusing.”
“Ah, I see.” I’ll reply. “Do you find it difficult to organize?”
“No, actually I’m very organized.”
“Hm. And how are you with finishing things?”
“Oh I have no problem with it.”
“Ok. So what else makes you think you have ADHD?”
“I also lost my keys last week. Does that count?”
I then reply three days later: “So sorry, I lost my phone that I was holding in my hand.”
And then I suggest the person be evaluated fully, because focus problems alone doesn’t mean you have ADHD. The same goes for losing things, forgetting things, interrupting people, being very active, or any other symptom we hear about at length. It doesn’t mean you don’t either, but there is more to having ADHD than simply experiencing these things.
Try to ask yourself: How often is this happening? Is it affecting your daily function? Is this something that could have another explanation, or that could be connected to a specific situation? All of these questions will help you figure out which way to go.
I’ve written this before, but it bears repeating: don’t try to push for a diagnosis, so much as you try to push for the truth. It may not be what you expected, but it’ll be the real deal, which’ll lead to real solutions. Remember that your problems don’t have to be ADHD-related to be valid.
Myth 5: ADHD is a superpower
This, I guess, is more of an opinion, but I wish people would stop saying it. It’s not true.
Superpowers are fictional. They, by their very definition, make you superhuman, and special, and magical.
ADHD is not only real, but the people with it are real humans who aren’t flying to anyone’s rescue or lifting buildings over their heads. They’re people who can be incredibly creative, empathetic, intelligent, enterprising, and engaging. They’re also people who regularly struggle with routine, planning, social anxiety, and a host of other things that many don’t understand.
ADHD can be intrusive, isolating, and confusing. It can also be beautiful and inspiring and incredible. Just like many other brains out there, ADHD brains deserve to be accommodated, but they don’t necessarily deserve to be treated like gold.
So let’s focus on just supporting ADHD brains, and leave the flying to Superman.
As much as we can focus, anyway.
Up, up and away.
If this sounds like you, and you’d love to have some help navigating your ADHD, check into what coaching entails, and then set up an intake call with me. I’d love to help.
